Note to the Facebook friend I unfriended

It’s not because you’re obviously a misogynist and I’m pretty much a feminist.

It’s not because our politics are as different as different can be.

It’s not because you can’t read anything I write about Hilary Clinton without insisting that she’s “shrill” and “menopausal” and using those exact words in your public comments on my Wall.

It’s not because you’re male and I’m female.

It’s not because we were only very casual acquaintances in high school and haven’t been in touch since.

I unfriended you today on Facebook because you don’t listen — least of all with an open mind.

You have an ax to grind and instead of burying the hatchet, at every opportunity you swing that axe with spurious glee and take aim at me simply because I’m doing my job. You may say those comments are made in jest, but there’s a lot of anger in your humor and it always puts women down. If you were a neighbor or someone I worked with or attended church or temple with, we might nod and smile but we wouldn’t call each other “friend.”

So please don’t think because we shared a brief bit of time together in the past that I’m going to give you a pass on being emotionally ugly. I don’t share my life with people who act like you do in the real world, so I’m not putting up with your boorish, deliberately rude behavior in my online life any more. I deserve better than that.

I deserve better than your attempts to puff yourself up at my expense.

We’re not friends, we were only Facebook friends, and now we’re not even that.

I don’t wish you ill. But I’ve grown tired of your insults and have shut the door after months of putting up and shutting up. No more. I hope you treat the people in your life better than you treat me. I hope you treat your wife, your female co-workers, the women you come in contact with daily with more respect than you have accorded me.

I don’t like feeling unhappy, but every exchange with you leads me down that road. So I’m ending it here. Now. It’s done.

Goodbye…and good luck.

One thought on “Note to the Facebook friend I unfriended

  1. Good for you, Linda. No one should have to put up with this kind of nonsense from anyone, least of all people who call themselves friends. Sometimes you just have to close the door hard. Sounds like you had good reason to do exactly that.

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